I am bound by chains of sadness. I cannot move, breathe, get up. I can’t reach out for happiness. That undeniable right was denied to me.

And it feels like life is a river rushing with great speed and force. I am trapped in the middle of the river, and I ache to be one of those people who managed to build their own boat. Who had nothing to stop them, nothing they could not bear. But I have chains that tie me to the river floor. I dearly wish that someone would let me hold on to their boat.

Some have. And I am grateful that they did so because it allowed be to put my head over the water. But the inevitable always comes: they see me pulling their boat down, but they never see the chains. They push me off the boat thinking I will float, not remembering when they found me drowning. At least I hope they don’t remember.

I down. And people ask me why I drown. And I can’t tell them about the chains because my mouth is underwater, and they are undeniably blind.


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